Monday, September 24, 2012

Finding Joy

At most of you know by now the last few weeks have been nothing but hard for me. I am trying to pick up the pieces of my life and figure out what God wants from me. I have been blessed the past few weeks with an amazing Sunday School class that has delivered so much comfort each week. God knows exactly what I need to hear each week and it is such a huge blessing. There are things in my life that I cannot control. The circumstances I find myself in are out of my control. I have never been good with situations that are out of my control. Trying to take control is an ongoing battle with God and I and maybe that is why God chose to put me through this battle to remind me yet again that He wants me to give Him control because he ultimately knows best.

Things have just been all over the place and I find it hard to express myself through words which is why I have left this blog neglected. I have learned in the last few days that I can't just bottle up things. I have to let some of it out every now and then. So here I am back at it again hoping to sort through some of the feelings and emotions. My journey is about finding joy in the Lord because life has proven that people are the wrong thing to look to.

God has given me so much to be thankful for. I am currently 14 weeks pregnant with a sweet little boy. I am beyond excited about being a mommy and continue to pray everyday that the Lord will continue to allow this sweet boy to grow healthy and I can't wait to meet him in late March. For the first time in my life I am excited about getting "fat." Haha.

I am still not sure what this sweet little boy's life is going to be like when he arrives but I pray about it every day. I pray that the Lord will give me the guidance to have the right attitude in all the things I am going through. Even if I have no control over what is going on, I have control over how I respond to it. So, I pray that the Lord continues to remind me that I can choose how to respond to daily challenges and gives me the strength to make the right choice. I know that the Lord will get me through this, in what way I do not know yet but I have faith that I will be able to praise Him in the end.

Until then, I will try to get better at blogging at least about how my sweet boy is doing. I go back to the doctor in another couple of weeks. I got to see my sweet angel a couple weeks ago and hear his sweet heart beat. The nurse said everything looks great and she was able to get a pretty good shot of his "boyhood." Here are the pictures I got to take home of my sweet little one.